Here's a Funny Story...

WARNING: The following story is based on a true story, but a lot of the parts are made up. If you cannot handle true almost true stories, close this window now!

It all started one beautiful day in.... well, I can't remember when it was but my brother Sam was at a birthday party. I was bored, so I decided to take a walk. On my walk, I passed three drunk guys, some dude in a bicycle helmet robbing a lady with blue and orange hair, and a man standing on another man's head. When I got back to my street, I saw a man beating up my friend Corey. I ran into my house, grabbed a rifle, a handgun, and a kitchen knife, and ran outside. First, with the handgun, I shot the person in the head. When he let go of Corey, I tossed Corey the rifle. I knifed the man in the back. Then Corey and I shot the man until he was dead. Then Corey came to my house and we jumped off of the roof eight hundred forty-seven million, three hundred sixty-two thousand, four hundred seventy-eight times. Then we went to Corey's house. His two BB guns were fully loaded, so we ran around the neighborhood having a battle. Then our friend Mason came out, and he fell into the manhole. Corey and I were worried, so we jumped in with him. By the time we got to the bottom, the rats had already completely devoured Mason. We climbed back up and nobody else is sure what happened to Mason. So I guess the moral of the story is-

DISCLAIMER:

NONE OF THIS STORY WAS TRUE!!!

except for the part about the Mason and the manhole.